Black Friday!

Black Friday

Black Friday is the day humanity wakes up and collectively decides frenzy is a personality trait and overspending is a spiritual experience.

This is the one day a year where:

Coffee is consumed intravenously.

Deals are hunted like cryptids.

And everyone pretends 70% off is a sign from the void that they’re finally gonna fix their life with a discounted air fryer.

Newsflash, hunny — capitalism didn’t choose you.

You were just awake at 2 AM when the sale timer went live, and now you've got 12 tracking emails from Amazon judging your choices.

People camp outside stores like it’s a pilgrimage, but shadow witches?

We don’t queue.

We lurk.

We lurk online, in the glow of overpriced mood lighting from Etsy, hunting for velvet tarot pouches, skull-shaped planters, and candle holders that look like they’ve seen some shit.

The best buys today are not logical. They are aesthetic decisions made by your inner abyss gremlin.

Because nothing says Black Friday quite like:

Vintage gothic nonsense

Black candles that match your soul

Accessories that look like haunted accounting supplies

And the defense mechanism of saying “It was on sale, that’s why” while your bank account sobs dramatically in Latin

Black Friday Witch Tip

Today we hex nothing, we bind no one, we spill no blood, we draw no circles.

We just sit back, scry the discounts, and whisper "add to cart" until the universe submits to our budget style choices.

The Real Curse of Black Friday

Not ghosts.

Not spirit nonsense.

Just free shipping minimums that force you to buy one more thing to qualify.

And you did it. You always do it. That’s why they invented it.

Bottom Line (Literally, on the Bottom)

If you want the actual majick of the shadows – the classes, the spells, the giveaways, the crumbs of knowledge you can't find in the dark corners of the internet?

Then stop flirting with the sale pages like it's a 5-second romance and commit to something with long-term power.

Subscribe monthly to Dark Witchery at the bottom of the page to actually get the classes and giveaways that change your craft instead of your kitchen appliances.

Subscribe Monthly to get classes and giveaways

→ Because the shadows reward loyalty, especially when the Wi-Fi behaves.

Darklady ✨️

Darkwitchery.com